Thy Sweet Maiden

So. Once upon a time. This Jotun dude, Thrym, threw a party for Thor and Loki. Or Thor and Loki when to the party or something. But anyway. Sometime during the party Thor became unwatchful, meaning he got totally shitfaced.
The next morning Thor woke up and couldn’t find his hammer so when of course when straight to his brother and was like ‘BROTHAR! HELP ME.’ And so Loki when to Frigga and asked
for her falcon dress which turned him into a bird. Loki, as the falcon, when out to Jotunheim and watched Thrym putting collar on his dogs. Loki then called out to the Giant and asked him where the hammer was. The Giant replied saying that it was hidden and no one could even find it. So Loki asked him what he wanted from the Gods in return for the hammer.
Thrym replied thusly, “Give me Freya for my wife.” Loki then flew back to Asgard to inform the Gods of Thrym’s request. In the council hall of the Gods Loki told them of Thrym’s request. And so everyone was like ‘FUCK NO.’ and Freya herself got suuuuper pissed and so they knew that that option was out of the question. But cunning Loki had come up with another solution.
“Let us dress someone else up as the goddess, the stupid giant will never know the difference.” He said and then it was agreed that the person who lost the hammer must dress up at the goddess, so he then went to Thor. Who was probably moping about the loss of his hammer.
So Loki says to Thor “YOU MUST DRESS UP AT THE GODDESS TO GET BACK THAT WHICH YOU HAVE LOST.”
“NO! THIS IS ONE OF YOUR CRUEL JOKES BROTHAR!” Thor replied and Loki just keeps going on about how Thor must dress up as a woman and finally he convinces Thor to do such a thing because it is their only option. So Thor and Loki, as ‘Freya’s’ bridesmaid head off to Thrym’s house. When they arrive there’s like this huge banquet right, for the bride and groom and so Thor sits down to eat and like consumes like 15 salmon and a whole side of beef and three casks of mead.
Thrym is very surprised at this SUPER MANLY behavior, and then Loki has to make up this excuse that ‘Freya’ is famished because ‘she’ hasn’t eaten in 8 days because ‘she’ was so excited to meet Thrym. Then Thor’s veil slips and everyone sees his glaring eyes and Loki has to say that ‘Freya’ hasn’t slept! Because ‘she’ was so excited. So the simple minded Giant excepts these excuses.
So, at the end of the meal when Thor and Thrym as to be married, Loki says “GO! FETCH THE HAMMER AND PUT IT IN FREYA’S HAND!” and so they do not know tha tit is really Thor whom they are giving the hammer back too. As soon as he gets his hammer Thor rips of his dress and is like
“WHAT’S UP MOTHER FUCKERS?!” and commences to smash up the house before he and Loki leave back to Asgard